In Which Our Vice President Reviews His High Level Education and Examines Exactly Why It Allows Him To Understand the ABC Series ‘Lost’ Better Than Any Living Human Being

Lost Thoughts, Week 3 of 16

I Know What Semiotics Are You Dumb Lost Writers

by the Vice-President in Chief Charge of the Country Dick Cheney 

My reaction to tonight’s ‘Lost’ can be summed up in my thoughts on the creation of the new Lost character the Sheriff, aka Isabel. I am the sheriff. There are no sheriffs on TV. I am the only sheriff you need worry about.

I told Alex I would only blog this week’s shitty episode if he posted a disturbing picture of Bai Ling. The complicit Jew-fuck that he is, he agreed.

Although this week’s episode sucked my gay daughter’s hard bone, the reality of the situation is this. Do not trust the Others. Trust me, I’ve been on that side of the coin. It’s not pretty. But you didn’t need me to tell you that.

Alex informing me that 24 was racist taught me a lot (The New Yorker even picked up on this meme), but I already knew a lot. I know who fucking Baudrillard is OK. Derrida was a tool. I read that in Commentary, mmkay.

Lost is pretty bad about Asians. I mean Jin(sp?)’s story? The son of a fisherman. That’s the most racist thing I’ve ever heard. And now an Asian slut. Wow. We’re really breaking ground here. This is awful.

Ironically another island show is beating the balls of Lost. Forget about how dumb Jeff Probst is, Survivor had one Asian winner, discovered they were the only people besides Gideon interested in the show, and made the new Fiji cast super-Asian. They’re actually differentiating between countries at this point, which is a step in the right direction.

In more pressing news, the story of Jack’s tattoo. Whoa, that really did wrap up a mystery on the show. He got it from some chick. Thank you. That really puts my mind at ease.

I’m starting to seriously doubt the Lost writers have thought beyond the next episode. My impression of them does not differentiate from the hilarious video making its way around the interweb. Hilarious shit. My only “bullshit” moment was the spoiler alert joke. A ‘spoiler alert’ is real. Let us not mock it.

The vice president of the united states is a contributor to this recording.

It’s crazy that one state could produce both this band and our nutbar of a president.

New album dropped yesterday.

“The Birth and Death of the Day” — Explosions in the Sky

“So Long, So Lonesome” — Explosions in the Sky

“Welcome, Ghosts” — Explosions in the Sky

“Remember Me as a Time of Day” — Explosions in the Sky

It’s weird that a band like this is popular, but they are kinda irresistible.

One thought on “In Which Our Vice President Reviews His High Level Education and Examines Exactly Why It Allows Him To Understand the ABC Series ‘Lost’ Better Than Any Living Human Being

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s