In Which Barack Obama Is All Up In The Stars And Shit

How can you really know a political candidate? This isn’t purely a rhetorical question, as my two part series on Obama was pretty much the final word on that. Still, the stars can speak of what man cannot conceive. We turn the podium over to our guest astrologer Zelina Kurkova, a friend of This Recording and the only person I trust to watch the stars.

The Supersuperdelegates:

Horoscoping the 2008 Presidential Election

by Zelina Kurkova

Barack Obama
August 4 1961
Honolulu, HI

Like many of you, I first encountered Senator Obama during his speech at the Democratic National Convention. I found him eloquent, sure, but also full of dark portents and a hot six-pack. As a Leo, Senator Obama is typically a Type-A personality with a steely exterior. What follows is my analysis of Mr. Obama’s star chart:

Rising Sign is in 02 Degrees Scorpio
You tend to be quiet, reserved, secretive and, at times, quite difficult to understand. Others notice your deep emotions and feelings and wonder how to draw you out. Stubborn and tough, you fight for any position you believe in. You are very resourceful and formidable when you become angered or upset about something. Easily hurt by others, you often strike back with bitter sarcasm.

Black: Obama 81% Clinton 7%
White: Clinton 50% Obama 39%

Women: Clinton 51% Obama 40%
Men: Obama 60% Clinton 28%

Sun is in 12 Degrees Leo.

More than a bit of a showoff, you love to be the center of attention! But others do not usually mind because they tend to enjoy your genuine warmth and affection. Very spirited and willful, proud and self-important at times, you demand your own way. You are quite honest, however, and the respect of others is very important to you. You never compromise yourself and you pursue your goals with persistence and dedication. Your regal presence and demeanor draws you to positions of leadership and authority.

yeah, i’m listening, keep talking

Moon is in 29 Degrees Taurus.
Warmth, comfort, security and familiar surroundings are necessary for you to feel at ease. Very loving and affectionate, you prefer a steady, patterned way of life. Patient, calm and steadfast, you are not easily upset. Others look to you for support. You tend to be a slow starter and a slow mover – others may try to rush you, but they will never succeed. Emotionally, you are quite stubborn – your attitudes about people and things were firmly set in your youth and will change very little as an adult.

Mercury is in 01 Degrees Leo.
You are usually quite convinced that your own ideas are correct and you enjoy persuading others that they are. At times, you are very stubborn and proud of your beliefs and principles, and you get very defensive when they are challenged. You appreciate truth and honesty – you practice it yourself and expect it in others. You have good talent for organizing, directing and planning. You delight in being asked for your advice and counsel.

barack demonstrated his p. size before he became a christian

Venus is in 01 Degrees Cancer.
You like to be very close to other people. You need emotional support yourself and are willing to give it to others. When you feel unloved and insecure, you can be very jealous and possessive. You are not interested in casual or superficial relationships – only deep emotional involvements interest you. Your faithful devotion is one of your greatest gifts, but be careful not to become too dependent on others. Learn to stand on your own two feet and demand your own rights once in a while.

samantha power accepting honorary degree from brown

Jupiter is in 00 Degrees Aquarius.
Your personal growth occurs when you have the freedom to do things in new and interesting ways – this brings out your natural inventiveness. You are an individualist, but you are also attracted to mass movements that emphasize social betterment and you will devote much time and energy to their efforts. Very fair- minded and objective, you have extraordinary skills at organization and administration.

“Tattoo (Jason Nevins extended remix)” – Jordin Sparks (mp3)

Saturn is in 25 Degrees Capricorn.
Very serious-minded and mature, you have the ability to take on responsibilities and to carry out important duties. You can also be trusted to be extremely practical and thrifty. A good organizer, you are the ideal one to be counted on to take a clearly defined project through to its logical conclusion. An achiever, you pride yourself on your ability to focus your attention totally on some worthy goal and then attain it.

“Shooting Star” – Air Traffic (mp3)

Neptune is in 08 Degrees Scorpio.
You are extremely interested in anything deep and mysterious. You will explore and idealize the benefits that can accrue from the study of the occult, healing and psychology. You are willing to experiment with substances like drugs in order to push your understanding of your inner being to the extreme.

N. Node is in 27 Degrees Leo.
You prefer to take the leadership role when it comes to dealing with others. You enjoy administering and organizing group activities. Others tend to listen to your suggestions because you aren’t usually overly domineering or patronizing in your interactions. You love to entertain in a big way – you’re at your best when throwing a large and lavish party. Your popularity and social success are assured as long as you don’t take others for granted – resist the temptation to become snobbish and arrogant.

Zelina Kurkova is an astrologer living in New York. This is her first appearance in these pages. Tomorrow Zelina examines the star chart of Hillary Clinton.

“Italy” – Akron/Family (mp3)


Please remember the victims of Cloverfield.

Dick Cheney asks: are women worth the bullshit?

Becca wants to get Knocked Up.

3 thoughts on “In Which Barack Obama Is All Up In The Stars And Shit

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